MLM IDOL

Wow guys, great job on the “How to Know When You’re Cooked” contest. More than 200 of you submitted entries and they are great. It made it very difficult to declare a winner.

So difficult in fact, I couldn’t select one. I finally narrowed it down to my favorite 25, and decided to let you be the judge.

Here’s the Top 25 below. Please pick your favorite ONE, and vote by the number in the comments below. I’ll keep the poll open for at least 30 hours, then total up the winner.

1) You know you’re cooked when…you are 100% blind and gave the best presentation in you life and then the prospect licks your face and you realize its your guide dog you just enrolled in your business.

From Dr Robin Rushlo

2) You know you are cooked when you’ve made your presentation, they seem really interested so you introduce them via a telephone call to your upline, an Ambassador no less, and they hang up in the middle of your Ambassador’s presentation. Then, after all that, they proceed to send you emails from a less than appropriate email address (FUBAR).

From Carol Barrett

3) This one just happened to me last week. I’m doing a presentation at a Village Inn, having a cup of coffee with my prospect, and about 10 min into my presentation, he excuses himself, telling me that he has to use the restroom, and I watch him get up, he goes the opposite direction, B-lining it to the front door, not to return again. Never had that happen to me before!

From Ken Boucher

4) You know you’re cooked when a prospect says, “You can’t make any money in this economy. I have to see what Obama is going to do first, then I’ll join.”

From Fiona

5) You know you’re cooked when the prospect says, ” I have you on camera and not only am I posting this to YouTube but I’m forwarding this to the F.T.C. You might as well just sit down and relax because the Federal Marshalls will be here any minute to take you away in cuffs. BTW this is personal because I tried one of these things once and I still have $1000 of water filters in my garage and never made a dime!”

From Craig Davis

6) You know you’re cooked when… they ask you if you’re almost finished because “Wheel of Fortune” is coming on in a few minutes.

From Bob Gutekunst

7) You know you’re cooked when a prospect says, “What are the monthly costs to join?” Instead of “How much money can I make every month doing this business”

From Stavroula Mougiakos

8) You know you’re cooked when your prospect looks at you when you ask them a question about their curiosity, and they say, “Oh, you want me to answer that NOW?”

From Gina

9) You know you’re cooked when they say, “My Ex will love this. Here is how to contact them… Tell them I sent you.”

From Dan Beresford

10) You know you’re cooked when….You spend your last $300 on a plane ticket across the country because your new recruit said he’d fill a huge room full of people. However, when you arrive, he’s 3 hours late picking you up at the airport. Then, you get to his house (where you’re supposed to be staying for the weekend) and discover he & his wife have been fighting for 5 days straight because he bought into some “MLM scheme” and she has decided that you’re not welcome in her home…you must find somewhere else to stay.

Your new rep is visibly upset, informs you that he hadn’t had any luck scheduling any meetings anyway, walks you to the door and asks you to leave.

You walk 3 miles in the snow…in dress shoes…dragging your rolling suitcase behind you. You can’t find a room you can afford (because this is New York & you spent your last $300 bucks on the plane ticket!) So, you end up walking across town (can’t afford the cab) and staying in a $40 a night dive with scratchy sheets and questionable activity in the room next door.

Because you can’t afford the additional cost to change your return flight, you sit in that dumpy hotel room for 2 days pondering the mess you’ve made of your life….you believe at that moment you’re cooked….

Then you go home and ROCK IT! 🙂

From Rachel Embry

11) Have you ever looked a cow directly in her eyes? I know I’m cooked when the prospect gives me the very same look.

From Marcos

12) You know you’re cooked when half way through the presentation the prospect looks at his watch, gets up and leaves. This actually happened to me.

From Mike

13) You know you are cooked when… you meet this absolutely great guy. You know ladies, the tall one with the cowboy boots and the “Marlboro Man” look who treats you like a princess. You fall head over heels, all the while thinking, “Oh, we could make such a great couple promoting my MLM together.’

One day he calls you up and asks you to attend a social function with him. You get all dressed up and he takes you to his Amway meeting and tells you he has been involved with Amway for about three years. You sit stunned and shocked throughout the presentation.

Afterwards on the way home, he looks over at you and says, “You know honey, with your knowledge of networking and my opportunity, we could make a great couple promoting my Amway business. Why don’t you give it some thought sweetheart? It’s time for me to settle down and you’re the one.”

Stumbling over your words, you say back to him, “Um, Um, how much have you made so far hon?” He replies truthfully, “Well sweetheart, I’m doing pretty good. I now make about $300 a month, but I know that with you and I together we could be like Barbie and Ken and reach for the Amway stars.”

I went home and cried for about an hour and then remembered my motto in life. “So many men, so little time!”.

TRUE STORY…. God, I still miss that man 🙂

From Sammy

14) You know you’re cooked when:

You meet the prospect for coffee at starbucks

She starts off: “I could never do what you do!” in a nasty tone

I reply, “what do you think I do?”

She sez “I could never do one of those party things!” takes a sip of the latte I just bought her

I ask “When was the last time I asked you to do a party for me or have been to a party I’ve done?”

She fiddles “umm never. But I can’t sell the stuff you have”

I persist “Have I ever given you a catalog or asked you to buy anything from me?”

She says “no” wondering where this is going

I say “Soooo then you really don’t know what I do, do you?” and smile and sip my coffee as a woman from another company comes up and congratulates me on my latest promotion- a white Mercedes!

oh, wait- I’ve cooked the prospect! Time to pull the fork out baby!

LOL. TRUE STORY~

From Sarah

15) You know you’re cooked when… your prospect says “Corporate America has provided for millions of people over the years! Why work harder than I have to? I can just show up for my job, sleep half the day, sexually harass the women, and pick up my pay check on Friday! Then I have so much money that I can buy TWO cases of brew, and sit in a drunken stupor the whole weekend! Besides, my job is secure and even if the company goes down, I will just collect my unemployment checks! Besides, I don’t any extra time with all the Internet surfing I do and all the video games I play! Besides, don’t you know all rich people are evil and take advantage of people? Stop trying to make money off me! At least my boss at work cares about me!”

From Eric

16) You know you are cooked when you look at your prospect and he is on his iPhone, on YouTube, watching movie trailers for the new transformers movie!

From Rob

17) You know you are cooked when your prospect looks you straight in the eyes and says, “That’s it, I want a divorce!”

From Dr. Tim Berry

18) You know your cooked when the prospect says to their spouse, “I’m hungry and know I get grumpy when I’m hungry”

From Kharee

19) You know you’re cooked when the guy says: I really like your hair, wanna go for coffee?

From Florence Bernard

20) You know you’re cooked when… your prospect pulls your pants down and barfs in your underwear, and asks if you can repeat that, cause I wasn’t really paying attention.

From Michael Melin

21) You know you’re cooked when after giving a fantastic presentation of all smiles and nods, your prospect puts in their hearing aid and says” You talking to me sonny? Gotta’ go now ” and leaves (Showing you a one fingered flying squirrel on the way out, and laughing hysterically).

22) You know you’re cooked when the prospect turns to his friend while pointing his finger at you and says in his best Al Capone impersonation: “I want him DEAD, I want his wife DEAD and his children DEAD, I want his sponsor DEAD and most of all bring me the head of Randy Gage on a platter!”

From Craig Davis

23) You KNOW you’re cooked when the prospect says,

“OMG It looks like it’s going to rain! I need to rush back now to keep my laundry. I’ll call you back!!!”

How cooked depends on the Weather factor:

1) Really Going to Rain: Raw

2) Clear Sky: Medium Raw

3) Sunny Day: Well done

4) Very Sunny Day: Overcooked!

From Maynas Eric

24) You know when you are cooked when the prospect offers you “I can help you by telling some of my friends to come and listen”… or when they say “Let me see how I can help you with this” without joining!

From Federico (Venezuela)

25) You know your cooked when you go to pick them up and your introduction pack is hanging on the door with a note something came up can’t make it I will call you. now you get to make the three hour drive home listening to Randy Gage tapes getting you ready for the next one.

From Ron Flintoo

All right world, the comment lines are open. Remember you must cast your vote to crown the “How to Know When You’re Cooked” MLM IDOL! Please just vote one time for your one favorite. You have at least 30 hours.

-RG

P.S. For you guys on the generic Tele-Seminar Tuesday night, THE TIME HAS CHANGED. It is now at 11 pm eastern instead of 10 pm. If you haven’t signed up, there may still be spaces left at: http://gagelivemlm.com

147 thoughts on “MLM IDOL

    1. I just love what happened to number 10….I just don’t think anyone can bet that with a stick.

  1. I have a hard time deciding between no 17 ( i want a divorce) and no 3. (need to go to rest room)

    may the best win.

    Greetz, Eric

  2. I vote for #6.
    You know you’re cooked when the presentation doesn’t capture the attention of the prospect who can only think of the TV program that he is missing.

  3. My vote is for #24 from Federico. Thats what usually happens when people cannot see the business opportunity and which to “get rid” of you politelly

  4. Definitely number 7, by Stavroula Mougiakos. While I had many moments where I had to laugh out loud at all these over the top situations (but in some strange way recognizable) Stavroula’s entry is actually a very realistic and true example of knowing when you’re cooked, where the prospect wants to give you the sense that they respect you but really aren’t interested. The other situations are so hilarious, I wouldn’t call that knowing you’re cooked, that’s cabaret. Had a great couple of minutes though, so thank you everyone. But my vote definitely goes to Stavroula Mougiakos for giving the most painful example, painful because it is so very recognizable and happens more than once.

    You know what’s really hilarous now…? Can’t find the ‘place comment’ button to activate my entry… okay, there it is, you’re a funny guy Randy! 😉 See you in Amsterdam!

  5. I absolutely hate those white Mercedesses and I love divorces or was it all those divorcees…..anyway, always had trouble understanding the difference between those in my English class….so this time it has to be the Doctor….number 17….but maybe I’m biased…. 😉

  6. Thank you for the nomination and the votes.

    There are some great entries here and it is hard to choose. What a great business we are in that we can laugh at ourselves, get “cooked” and still continue.

    My vote goes to number 3 for real life humour.

  7. I vote for #3 his is the most realistic seriously this isnt a game it just goes to show how much work and time we put into our businessand SOME of us think to make up some silly story that knocks all of us out of the contest. Seriously guy and gals we work hard and the silly stuff that really isnt true is kinda unfair to the ones who have really great true stories and thier intiative and then they get cooked…. now thats when you know your cooked!!!!!

  8. I am totally glad that I got nominated!!!

    I would vote for mine, but considering that is kind of childish I will give my vote to #14…

    Still like the Oscars just being nominated will definitely get me a better paycheck on my next movie! HAHAHA

    Good job everybody!

    Federico

  9. #19.
    That’s exaclty what I guy would do. I am not interested in the business but I am interested in you hair style.

  10. 9) You know you’re cooked when they say, “My Ex will love this. Here is how to contact them… Tell them I sent you.”

    From Dan Beresford

  11. I would vote for #6, but I wrote it. I can’t vote for anything that “ROCKS”. I am so sick of that word being used.

    I’ll vote for #4 because…

    I guess because I keep up with the real news.

  12. # 10 – I am a native New Yorker. I can relate.

    Congratulations to all the finalists, and thanks for the laughs.
    Peace & Success!

  13. My vote is for #14! Paybacks have a way of letting others know that you are not as stupid as they seem to think. One of the best quotes from my father was that “Stupidity is an equal opportunity employer” and even today I have trouble understanding how many prospects just “don’t get it”.

  14. I can’t vote for any of this phony stuff. Out of all of these only a few are serious.Randy I thought you would chose serious comments. A lot of these are “Just A Joke”

  15. I vote for #15
    these are blabberings of people who lack VISION and DREAMS;quite unfit for N W M

  16. Number 3 is real. Too bad many are misinformed about our industry. Very little curiosity even. You just can’t give what isn’t wanted. Thanks Randy.

  17. number 17, simple and to the point (I’m happily married, nothing to do with it, but it’s great!!!)

  18. Ok Kids, the polls are closed! We have the Iranian Election commission tabulating the ballots and the grand prize winner who will receive fame fortune and adulation will be announced soon!

    -RG

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